Trust Me

Jeff and I were very careful about our selection of Little Explorers as the preschool, Kindergarten, and child care program for our children. Just as we did when I was pregnant and we were seeking childcare for my return to work, we took our decision very seriously. When I was looking for childcare, I was looking for someone who would respect my parenting methods. I was looking for someone who would provide things that I didn't but that also matched the things we did at home. When I was interviewing pediatricians, I asked a lot of questions about philosophy and how different situations would be handled. When Jeff and I visited preschools, we nterviewed the Director, we asked lots of questions, and we often walked out knowing it wasn't the right place. Some places were a flat out "no way." Some were "if we don't find something better but it just isn't right." Then we walked into Little Explorers. It's small. It's privately owned. The owner is onsite and fully involved with the teachers and kids and parents. Lori's methods and philosophies and ideas and passion and intensity matched our own. Within minutes of walking in, we knew we'd found It. When I post stories about how things have played out at school, please trust me. Please trust, as I do, that when there has been a situation with my child that the staff involved have truly handled the situation well. Lori will never hire someone who can't or won't follow the appropriate and best practices. When I post a story about something that has happened at school, keep in mind that it's the 3rd hand or more version of the story. And that I don't have every single detail to share. But that I do trust that the teachers and staff at the school handle situations with my daughter (and soon, with my son) in the best and most appropriate manner that is best for Teagan's learning and development. In fact, I trust that they handle things more consistently and evenly at school than I do at home. There is an ongoing conversation between school and home. Just today, one of the teachers asked for my advice. "When Teagan just stares at you and refuses to answer about the choices she made, what do you do?" I'm very fortunate that this school not only already incorporates my own ideals about discipline and structure and growth but they are also open to and respectful of my own input. Some might say that I shouldn't be so blind. Some might say that I shouldn't be so trusting. Well, this is one area that you will have to just... trust me. *** I had some emotional stuff come up yesterday in regards to parenting my daughter. A lot more detail will come in a couple of weeks when I feature my friends Lindsey as a Mother Who Moves Me. I cried. I had this big moment of realization. I can't quite call it an epiphany because I still don't know exactly what to do with it. I'm sure I'll work some of it out when I'm writing up my piece on Lindsey. Quite often, I use this blog as a way of working through something I don't have answers for. Quite often, as I write, I find insight and understanding that I didn't have before. Sometimes, writing is a very deep, personal, and spiritual experience for me that I choose to share with you. Perhaps being so open and leaving myself so vulnerable leaves me open to attack or misunderstanding. Perhaps I shouldn't put so much of myself and my life out there. Some take my openness and misunderstand it for cockiness or egoism. I guess you will just have to... trust me. *** Sometimes I worry that I have painted a picture of my Healthier Me self that isn't completely accurate. I struggle. Sometimes, a lot. I've got the exercise thing still going. Maybe not with the same vigor as before. But I'm getting up, being active, and getting exercise about 4-5 times each week. I'm about 75% happy with my eating. I have an excuse each time. Vacation. Stress about work. Stress about parenting. More stress about parenting. But it's my choosing and it's my behaviors. I am focused on the positive- and there is a lot of positive. But there is a lot of negative that I don't share. There are after bedtime treats. There are quick little snacks at work. There are bad choices in restaurants. I'm not beating myself up. I'm not making excuses. This is my demon that I have to fight on my own. This is my battle, my choice. When I'm finding things that work, I share it. I talk about food and exercise that is working for me. Some people might notice that I haven't seemed as excited about running lately. Some might say that my oomph is gone. Some might wonder if I'm really living the things I say I am. I'm being as honest as I know how to be and I'm going to keep talking about what is working for me and I'm going to keep working through what isn't working for me. And someday... I hope to be able to completely... trust me.