Don't Be A Hater

This is a subject I haven't been wanting to write about.

But then I read Shell's post today. And I'm taking the pledge.

I've really avoided most of the blog wars that go on. I tend to be pretty unaware of blog battles. I might catch wind of it via Twitter or something but I tend to not jump into the fray- mostly because I'm unaware of the situation.

My own situation isn't exactly about blogging.

I shared just yesterday about some experience I have with online communities- forums. There's one that I'm part of that is for local moms. From that community, I have haters. Some read my blog, one has left vitriolic comments on a few occassions that have caused me to turn comment moderation on and off and on and off. These women have led a campaign directly poking fun at me on Facebook. I've been the topic of conversation at gatherings- and never in a positive light.

I hesitate to bring it up because I don't want to poke a stick into it all.

Bottom line is that they don't like me. At all.

Honestly, I'm fine with that. There are people I don't understand out there. There are people that I don't agree with. There are people I don't like.

But I don't go after them or people connected to them. I don't spend time and energy putting negativity into the world in relation to them.

The funny thing is that on this online forum, I often agree with members of this group. And I post my similar opinion. In this online forum, happy faces are put on. In this online forum, some may just ignore me.

I'd prefer that. Because now I'm hearing that people in this group may be negatively impacted because they don't jump on the hate-wagon. And I'm never fond of my friends being hurt by others.

Here's what I see in this pledge. I see a chance for women (all bloggers, really) to stand together and say that it isn't ok to be cruel and hateful and mean. That it isn't ok to sit at a keyboard and be ugly and intend to cause harm. I see an opportunity to pledge to support, defend, and help others.

There will always be people in the world who don't like you or who don't like themselves or who are living with emptiness inside them. I've always thought that the important thing is to take the "high road" and not engage those people when they try to tear you down. And I think that is still best. While there is always a temptation to lash back, all that does is continue the hurt and negativity.

Funny how timing works because this all relates so well to what I posted yesterday about meekness. When someone disagrees with me, be tender without surrender.

To modify a quote from that post:

I will permit no Mommy/Blogger to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate them. -Booker T. Washington