Life has been very hectic for a few months now. The primary change is my work situation. Same job, same people, massive increase in responsibilties and stress levels and work hours.
I had a lovely little routine. I had a lovely work load- I had enough to keep me busy, I had a little bit of down time here and there, and I knew I was always able to take a day off without much stress, I knew I could go for a 40 minute run at lunch or hit the gym at lunch.
Now, I’m bringing work home most nights of the week and often over the weekend. Now, I rarely get a lunch break. Now, a day off means not really disconnecting from my workplace.
Big changes like that bleed out into other aspects of life. Less working out, grabbing food when I can, bad diet choices. I feel like my time is strained and I work hard to keep my family my main focus.
And I’m stressed and exhausted. And there are times that I’m angry, frustrated, beat down, and ready to quit.
I’ve returned to an old habit.
Bad day? Cheetos, please. Sudden increase in work load? Snickers ice cream bar would be great! Big deadline? I’d love a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos and some Twizzlers, thanks!
I come home and eat a good dinner, sit down to do more work or to just relax or to spend time with my husband and it starts… a voice from the kitchen…
“Aye, Carumba! Chips n salsa need you!”
“Liiiiz… chocolate ice cream and syrup are waiting for yoooooou!”
“You deserve to treat youself- come make another sandwich with a side of chips!”
I’m battling it but it’s hard. I keep trying different strategies but nothing touches some of these cravings.
I’ve tried figuring out exactly what gets satisfied when I eat. What exactly I’m stuffing down. My best guess is that it feels like something I’m easily in control of and something that provides immediate comfort.
The stress isn’t going to let up any time soon. I’m spending a lot of time focusing on how to manage it better.
But I’m currently losing the food battle.
Have you won? Help me! Are you currently struggling? Let’s face it together.