Thursday, February 18, 2010

Dear Jeff,

I love you. Recently, I've been witness to the lives of some friends and acquaintances and been left feeling so very sad for some of the things they've shared. Women who are in marriages where they don't feel loved. Where they question why they got married in the first place. Where they feel lost, confused, alone. Where they are hurting or being hurt. I am so blessed that I have you in my life. Our life is so... normal, calm, routine, everyday. I cannot fathom not coming home to you every evening or waking up to you every morning. There is no one else that I want by my side through thick and thin. I love that I feel so safe, so secure, so trusting, so trustworthy with you beside me. There are 2 things that I want you to know. I love that we laugh together and that we've learned how to laugh with the stuff that parenthood has thrown at us and continues to throw at us. I think some people enter a marriage thinking there is an out if they need it- that there are deal breakers. We talked about it before we got married- about those things that would end the marriage. If you cheated on me, if I cheated on you... if you hit me, if I hit you. Things that we couldn't recover from. I don't feel that way anymore. It's not that I'd be ok with you hitting me or cheating on me. It's that I so fully and deeply trust you and know you that I have no insecurities about who you are as a husband. It's not a risk. When I look forward, there are no doubts about who I will be standing beside. I simply cannot imagine my life without you. I know I baffle you sometimes. I know we have our disagreements or bad moods. But the thing is... I get these reminders of how life might be for the people around us... I think about all the families in our neighborhood, in our church, in our lives and I wonder about their hurts, their mistrusts, their secrets... and I am just so proud of us. I am so proud that you are my husband- so honored that you chose me. We have both been broken people before. We have both been hurt in deep, deep ways. But you know what? You have filled me with so much love and trust and joy and peace... you have given me such an immeasurable gift... together, we have taken our broken selves, filled each other up with so much beauty and now we have this normal life. A normal, content, happy life. We have struggles, we have joys, we have celebrations, we have losses. We have each other. And I wouldn't want my life to be any different. ily Photobucket

12 comments:

Mellodee said...

Being aware of your good fortune is a gift to treasure. Too often, we don't say what we feel, until something happens and its too late. That's a tragedy!

blueviolet said...

I'm so glad you are so happy in your marriage! When I got married, I went into it knowing that no matter what, I wasn't leaving it. Unfortunately, I think that commitment kept me in a marriage that wasn't right for far too long. So in my case, I wish I had realized there was an out from the beginning. Finally, I'm getting my out and now I look forward to a future with something similar to what you have ! :)

Momza said...

Where you are is a Good Place to be in.
Love it, Live in every sweet moment, breathe it in, and let it sustain you forever.
You and your sweetheart are giving your children something rare, something that money cannot buy...an example of what love looks like...bravo!

Mary said...

That is the kind of relationship I've always wished for, and yet continued throughout my life to make very poor choices when it came to men. I am so happy to see people who truly love and trust the way you do, it give me hope that someday there will be someone that I feel that way about and who feels the same way about me.

Lynn Freeman said...

Awesome Liz....just simply awesome. Not only that you're in that type of marriage with that type of spouse, but that you can put into words what it means to you. I, too, am envious of that. We all have our marital challenges, some more than others, and as we try and work through them it helps so much to read something like this. So thank you AGAIN for giving me something to think about and be hopeful and thankful for.

Karen said...

I hope some day I get to know what that's like, Liz. I'm glad you've got such a wonderful marriage and family. It's nice to know those things really do exist.

Denise said...

Great post! Glad you are happy :)

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Shell said...

That's beautiful! Too many people have lots of dealbreakers. That's why there's so much divorce. One reason, anyway.

The Girl Next Door Grows Up said...

Awww - that was really sweet!

THat is how I feel about my husband too.

We are lucky.

Flartus said...

Jeff is one lucky man.

C. Beth said...

Beautiful, Liz. Awesome. :)

whacked daddy said...

Thank you for writing this beautiful letter. It's been a tough week around here and reading your post gave me a second to reflect on how lucky I am too. Thanks