My Kids Have 2 Mommies

My baby fell. My baby got hurt. And I'm going to whine about it. We arrive at Lisa's. The kids are bundled up in their warm coats. We go in the kitchen (hard floor). Teagan is asking me to tell Lisa some details about our plan for dinner (she's going to make great choices all day so that we can have cinnamon rolls for dinner). Suddenly, Zach takes a step, his foot flies out from under him, and he lands face first, mouth first, on the hard floor. He starts the big sucking in air cry... I'm waiting for the scream, I'm holding him to my shoulder, against my coat, trying to calm him down. First glance, as I picked him up, was that he was fine. But he picked his head up from my shoulder and Lisa reacts and I look- blood. And it sure seemed like a lot. Coming out of the corner of his mouth, soaking into my coat. Lisa goes to grab napkins, I ask for ice. Start cleaning him up, trying to still calm him and also assess where the injury is. He enjoys sucking on ice and I can see that his upper lip is swelling and turning purple-blue on the bottom/inside. And here is where my heart breaks. I am on the floor with him, Lisa is standing over us. I am holding him and holding his ice and so on. And he reaches for her. She picks him up, he puts his head on her shoulder, calms down. She puts him back down. And I hold it all in. Because it is good that he has 2 people he can count on and turn to and who love him and take care of him. Because I am relieved that he truly loves Lisa and feels comforted by her. But... I don't even have to type any words. Any working mom who has had her babies in daycare knows what I am saying. Understands. Has had their own heart break and sing and weep and laugh at the same time. My baby got hurt today. And I am not there to be with him, to choose soft and cold foods for him, to help him drink from a cup, and to offer medication as needed. I am not there with his blankie, my breast, his mommy comfort. He has someone who will comfort him, feed him, hold him. And I am here, at work, in my office, trying to hold it all in.

Snip, Snip! The Haircuts!

Miracles do happen. I've long believed it and can show examples of many miracles in my life. Some are big deal, life impacting miracles. And some are normal, every day type miracles that you just have to be watching out for. Friday, I got my miracle. I had so many nice responses to the post about missing Teagan's first haircut- it was very touching. It's good to know that others have felt the same, understood, sympathize and empathize. This mothering thing is hard. Working and mothering is hard, too. Without going into too much detail, for the sake of protecting the innocent, I'll just say that a way was found for me to be with my kids for their haircuts. YIPPEE! And, to add to the miracle, Jeff was able to be there, too! Teagan went first. She was very excited to be "the one" in the chair. She's watched and watched the other kids get their haircuts and now it was finally her turn in the spotlight. As you can see, she was quite pleased with how things were going. It was all too good to be true... to have a first haircut go so smoothly. And this is Teagan we are talking about- the Queen of the Mood Swing.

And the funny thing? That meltdown has NOTHING to do with getting her hair cut. Lisa's son came home from school and Teagan was mad that she didn't get to see his school bus. So the first half of the hair cut was idyllic and the second half was some weird Kafka-esque scream fest. OK, maybe not that bad. But hugely frustrating.

And it dampened her mood significantly. Here she is after the cut. No more screaming or crying but you can see that she is still not back to happy, excited hair cut girl.

I was kinda sad about the haircut after it happened. Not much I could do about it, of course. But during her bath Friday night, she leaned her head back so I could rinse the shampoo from her hair. I'm used to that head tipped back hair reaching down to the lower part of her back, very top of her bottom. Not anymore. Now her tipped back hair reaches halfway down her back. I know it's hard to tell much difference in her dry hair. But the change when washing it made me a bit melancholy. And Zach had his turn, of course. Let me tell you- I haven't actually seen many first haircuts. I have seen a lot of pictures of first haircuts and it seems to almost always involve screaming and tears. But not Zappy! I know this primarily had to do with Lisa being the one to cut his hair. He was in a kitchen he knew and the people that were doing all this weird stuff to him were people he knows, loves, trusts. That is what really made it all ok for him. Here he is before... this was last week, playing with his sister (hence the headband). And here is the haircut! Lisa even used clippers on him. I love the look on his face in this one...

And a couple fun, random shots... Mohawk baby!

Sharing some love with Lisa during the haircut (you wouldn't ever get THAT in a salon- at least, not without risking arrest or something). And my baby... now looking like a BOY. Looking old and handsome and big. Not so much a sweet, feathery baby.

Saturday morning... pj's, haircuts, and a chair to share. That's what life is all about!

So don't miss the miracles. The little ones can often have the biggest meaning and get you what you most need at the time!

Learning

I'm still learning this whole blogging business. I had started a new post on Friday but just a quick start because I wanted to be able to focus when I wrote... so I finally published it today and it is way down the page where it would have been had I published it on Friday! So look further down (or click here) to read it!

A Dream Realized

Not so long ago, I posted a little confession.

I also let my readers in on a little secret plan that Jeff and I had to get out and see a movie on a long lunch hour... but the plan was thwarted by the urgency of all pre-teens and tweens and such to see High School Musical 3 on the day it opened.

But today... our dream came true. Jeff and I went on a date and saw HSM3. True dat. We missed the 4:00 show and ended up in the 4:30 screening... of the SING ALONG version of the film! Yup. Had we only seen it before, we could have been singing along with Gabriella and Troy and Sharpay and the gang.

It was as cheesy and corny and syrupy as anticipated. And I loved almost every minute of it. There was seriously some awesome choreography. The funniest moment? There were about 12 families in the crowd. A family of 4 comes into our row and sits down. So the row is Jeff, me, a chair with my purse and jacket, a little girl, a mom, a little boy, a dad. When they sit, the dad looks over at us with this chummy eyeroll of "Gosh. Can't believe we all got dragged into this one..."

Yeah. Joke's on YOU buddy. No one dragged us here! Ha!

Sadly, no one sang along...

I Need An Airplane

I wanna fly to San Diego or San Francisco. I keep watching coverage of the protests against the passing of Prop 8. I want to be there.

I'm not in the mind frame to explain it all right now.

But dammit. I want to be there. I want to join in the voices. I want to be part of the numbers. I want to stand up for those who are being pushed down.

I'm not there. But my heart and mind are.

A New Laptop!!

Quick note... Yahoo for Jeff! I love being married to an IT geek. My laptop was falling apart. It worked fine- a little slow, a few glitches here and there. But it did what I needed it to do. And then the screen hinge broke. So the wires are stressed if I close the laptop. Last night, Jeff worked it all out for me by getting a new laptop all set for me! Very exciting. And it's got Windows Vista on it so we'll see what I think of that. I'm a PC. Just so you know. More later... gotta get back to the fam!

Contradictions

I read something on The Atlantic's website and I really felt like sharing it. http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200811/multiple-personalities "If you ask people which makes them happier, work or vacation, they will remind you that they work for money and spend the money on vacations. But if you give them a beeper that goes off at random times, and ask them to record their activity and mood each time they hear a beep, you’ll likely find that they are happier at work. Work is often engaging and social; vacations are often boring and stressful. Similarly, if you ask people about their greatest happiness in life, more than a third mention their children or grandchildren, but when they use a diary to record their happiness, it turns out that taking care of the kids is a downer—parenting ranks just a bit higher than housework, and falls below sex, socializing with friends, watching TV, praying, eating, and cooking." I must be quite the minority. I am definitely happier at home or on vacation than at work. Not that I am unhappy at work. But I would just rather be wherever my kids are. Taking care of the kids is a downer? Not for me. It's stressful sometimes. It is hard work a lot of the time. But I feel happiest when I am out with my kids, playing and exploring. You wouldn't have known that had you seen us in a restaurant for breakfast this morning. But it really is the truth. When I am at work, I will always prefer to leave, get my kids, go to the park, go home, whatever. But, another part of the truth is that I do enjoy and value my job. I like having a lunch break. I like having the ability to use my brain to problem solve warehousing and inventory and production problems and not just constant demands for candy or nose wiping or finding the right blue crayon. When I am sitting on the couch and my Teagan is dancing around the living room, gleefully singing a made up song about loving her Mommy and Daddy... there is no where else I would rather be. And on the flip side, when Teagan is having a meltdown, a tantrum, an out of control fit, there isn't anyone else I would want there, dealing with it with her. There are other people I trust with her, of course. Others that I know would guide her through the difficult emotions bringing on the meltdown. But, in all honesty, if she is going to be screaming and crying, I want to be there with her. So I get the point of the article. And maybe I'm just an oddball. And maybe part of the problem with the world today is that so many parents do want to find as many ways as possible to not be with their kids. I don't know. I don't claim to have any answers. So read the article and then share your POV. I'd love to hear what others think. Are you happy with your life and each moment as it comes? Are you frequently wishing you were somewhere else, wishing for something different? If you are truly happy, share it. And if you aren't, let's figure out what you need to do to get happy with all that you have!