Thursday, December 29, 2011

My Pretend Sister

My brother, Ted, and his girlfriend, Em, came for a visit the past 2 days.  It's kind of an annual tradition at this point.  It used to be that they were coming to Indy for a convention and we'd see them for an evening.  We also enjoy a 1 or 2 night stay every summer.  This year, they were skipping the convention and just coming to see us.

I love these visits.

Ted and I didn't grow up together.  I was 15 when he was born and I went off to college when he was just 3 or 4 years old.  We don't have a lot of shred growing up memories, we can't tell a lot of stories about our shared experiences with our parents.

But now he's all grown up.  He'll be finishing college soon and embarking into life in the Real World.  Going off to college really opened him up to new experiences and also gave our relationship a new definition and purpose.

He's my brother.  But we are also friends.  We laugh and talk and discuss all kinds of things.  He's come to me for advice before.  He knows he can talk to me about anything without judgment or embarrassment.

And he has this fabulous woman in his life.  He's had a thing for her since his freshman year but they were just friends for a while.  However, the planets aligned and they came together- they truly seem to be destined for one another.

Em is smart, funny, pretty, full of energy, compassionate, and has a great understanding of the world (at least for someone in her 20's).

Best of all, Em and I really like each other.  Even before Ted and Em started dating, Ted kept telling me that I just HAD to meet Em.  I thought it was kind of weird that he wanted me to meet someone who was just a friend but then I met her and realized... she is so much like me!

The visit this week was wonderful.  We didn't do anything Big and Exciting.  We hung out at home (I actually cleaned for them!).  Best of all, my brother ended up spending a lot of time with my kids and Em and I had this golden opportunity to just sit and talk.

My happiest dream would be for these two to end up getting married and moving into my neighborhood.  I can totally see Jeff and Ted doing home improvement things together and teaching Zach and Teagan about building and mowing and so on.  I can envision Em and I sitting on her porch or in my living room, sharing some wine and talking the night away.  I can see my kids babysitting their kids.  I can see my kids spending the night at Aunt Em and Uncle Ted's.  I can see their kids spending the night at our place.

I can see me having a sister.  I can see me being a big sister to a sister.

I can see a future filled with my non-rhythmic brother Just Dancing with my kids.

I know I shouldn't get ahead of myself.  And I know they can't make decisions based on what I want.  But if Ted and Em were to announce that they were engaged, that they planned to get married in about a year and a half (when Em finishes grad school) and that they want to live in Indy... it would be a pretty happy day for me!



Alison said...

I remember your earlier posts about how much you like Emma. I'm glad to know the love is still there. :)

You make me think of my own sister in law. Growing up, my brother had questionable taste in girlfriends, so I was very relieved when he married a very sharp, funny and confident woman. I sent her a card early on, welcoming her to the family, and telling her how happy I was that my brother chose her (a communication very much against the grain of our family's style). She really appreciated it, and I think it's always in the back of her mind now.

I made the effort because even though my brother and I don't mesh well, siblings are such an irreplaceable kind of family--we share so much more with them than with our parents. Who else will we spend our entire lifetimes with? Now I'm even more grateful for my s-i-l, because she's actually helped my brother and I stay closer than we would have otherwise. Plus, you know...nephews and niece. ;)

Garret said...

No pressure on the brother... LOL.

C. Beth said...

What a gift to have a "sister" (for forever, or for a time) when you didn't grow up with one. Sounds like you're making up for lost time. Wishing them the best (and hoping their best just happens to match up with yours!)