Monday, April 21, 2014

It's Your Blog: Angelic

Hi, I'm Angelic and I'm a single mom. I'm not here to talk to you about the trials of being a 29 year old working, single mom. I'm here to talk about lyrics from one of my favorite songs and how they get me through when I'm feeling down. 

This is a song that most people probably haven't heard as I have a different love of music than most people. The song is "The One You Feed" by Crown The Empire and the lyrics that are the topic of this post are "The only way to shine your light is in the dark. Never let life kill your spark." 

I have tried followling this little saying long before I actually heard the lyrics. My twenties have been far from easy and have come with a lot of ups and downs. I've tried to hold on to what light I can and find the positives even when it seems there isn't anything.

You see, I'm a single mom because 5 years ago I had to walk away from a marriage that just wasn't very good. I'll spare you the details, but it left me in a very dark place and I struggled with liking myself. It was a battle for me to keep going. I suffered for quite awhile with self injury. I had to take away the emotional pain by causing myself some physical pain. Shortly after my divorce I started a relationship with yet another guy that ended poorly after two years and in that time I also had to go through two surgeries for Cervical Cancer. I pushed my way through it all though. Even while still suffering through self injury, I would work to find little things to cheer myself up and to be a bright spot.

For the last almost 2 1/2 years I went on a journey to find myself. One of my biggest bright spots has been music. It makes my inner "spark" brighter and shines when I feel like I'm in a dark place. It is a huge part of who I am and I was finally able to find that out. I've even stopped with harming myself. Yes the urge is there still sometimes but instead of injuring myself I will pick up my guitar and play or turn on my music and just listen. Going through those dark spots in life helped me shine my light brighter. I struggled but I didn't let it kill me though it tried many of times.

Remember that you have to go through some bad and rough moments to find the good. Even the smallest things can get you through those rough spots. Never let the darkness snuff out your fire! Don't let life kill your spark!

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