Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Spreading Good News
I have to admit that I've been hesitant to post this. But it's been weighing on my mind for a while and I'm honestly not sure if this is just my experience or not. Why is the opposite of whining or complaining always bragging? What is so horrible about being blessed? About working hard and accomplishing? Why is there shame or embarassment about life being good? It's like we're feeling guilty about making someone who doesn't have those things feel worse about not having those things. But why don't they worry that they're negativism will bring down someone else's positivty about those things? Why is there a hesitancy to say that things are good? The other day on Facebook, someone posted about some thing where Dr. Oz says that Indianapolis is the most sexually satisfied city. I have no idea where that comes from or what kind of survey or research was done. But the question was asked- do you agree? And the immediate responses indicated some very dissatisfied women. *Ahem* I'm fortunate to be rather blessed in that area. And I had to think about whether or not I wanted to say something to that effect in this Facebook conversation. Have you ever been in a situation where the majority of the group is complaining about something and you don't have that complaint so you feel like you can't participate in the conversation? My life is good. My life is blessed. Jeff and I work hard to have the things we have and live the life we live. We have good jobs, good careers, good salaries, good benefits. We have great friends and family. We love our church. We love each other. I guess when people are in the negative line, they don't want someone to come along and try to bring sunshine to the storm? What about women who hate themselves, have low self esteem, hate their bodies? They don't want to hear from me about how I love the belly that held my babies, I love the muscles in my arms and legs, I love my arms that hold my husband, I love the legs that let me walk and run and jump. I love my nose and boobs and jiggly upper arms and the junk in my trunk. Are you someone who chooses to stay focused on what you don't have? Do you hate to hear from someone that seems to have what you want? Or are you someone who has goals and is working towards those goals? Are you someone who accepts what is and seeks to make the best of it? Here's the deal... I'm no braggart. I'm never trying to make anyone else feel "less than." But I'm not going to hold back on my blessings and good news and feelings! My life is good and I share our blessings in many ways and I see no reason to not be excited about where life has brought me. I came from a hard and dark place- too much chaos. Everything in my life is opposite of what my life has been in the past. I make good money. I have a great sense of security that I could stand on my own 2 feet because of my career. I've worked for this company, this department, for more than 10 years and struggled through some hard situations and I'm now very comfortable with my salary. My husband makes a good salary in a job he has worked at for more than 2 decades. I am amazed by him because he is completely self taught in his field and he is very smart and knowledgable and has a solid sense of loyalty and a strong work ethic. He and I both have great benefits working for great companies. I have a good marriage. Sure, we disagree or get crabby or have things we need to work out. But we love each other and trust each other and enjoy each other. There is no one else in the world that I would want to see at the end of each day and wake up next to each morning. We work hard to compromise, to be partners, to support and love each other. I love my body. It isn't perfect in the definition of the fashion world. I am a size 12-14, I weigh around 200-something pounds. And I am strong and I have muscles and I work hard for it. I have a round, flabby belly- and the entire reason I have it is because of those beautiful babies that grew inside of me. I love the face that looks back at me each morning. I'm healthy. I am working on eating right and exercising daily. I'm working on being stronger and faster and able to endure longer activities. Even in the years that I didn't treat my body well, my body took care of me and I'm very happy and relieved to not yet be facing heart problems or blood pressure problems or diabetes or thyroid problems or anything else I was tesetd for at my physical a few months ago. I have great friends (I posted about that yesterday so i won't go into details). I get along with and love my in-laws. I get along with and love my family. I'm friends with my mom and my brothers. I suppose I could spend my time finding things to complain about and be negative about. I suppose I could jump in on the bitch sessions about husbands who don't mow the grass or co-workers that gossip about me or about being stretched thin at the end of the pay period or about having a headache or my sinuses acting up. But why focus on a few negatives when there is so much positive in my life? And why should I ever feel ashamed that I have good news and blessings? Why would I ever hold that back? Especially when anyone can truly live their life this way. When I am overwhelmed by the negative slamming into me- not enough money after paying the bills, having to cancel vacation plans, stressful situation at work, friends being cruel, kids getting sick- I can either ride that negative wave and get totally sucked under the surf by all of the stress or I can: Stop. Breathe. Focus on Now. And realize that life is good. Even when I was living in a dark place, life still had blessings for me to appreciate. I just had to learn how to see them. Yes, tragedy happens and we have to struggle through it. I've been there, too. I've had life slap me around and beat me down and leave me broken. But I don't choose to stay broken. I choose to fight back- over and over again. And maybe, if we all take the time to share the beauty we see around us, to share the positive things going on in our lives, maybe we could inspire someone else to reach for the same thing in their own life. Maybe it will show someone that good is possible- that bad isn't the only choice in life. Maybe we should all focus on spreading Good News.