Sunday, May 3, 2009
It Was the Best of Times... It Was the Worst of Times
Motherhood, that is. Parenthood, I should say. Teagan is 4. Zach is 18 months. They can absolutely delight me. As I type, they are sitting together in a rocking chair, watching Tinkerbell and sharing crackers. Teagan feeds her brother, they hug, they giggle. This is a major change from the past couple of days. Teagan did not have a good day on Friday at daycare. She was whiny and demanding and not playful. Saturday was extremely difficult in our house. Teagan was demanding, whiny, dramatic, mean. She would stick out her tongue when she didn't like what she was told. She would tease her brother. She would lie blatantly. We had a busy day scheduled and maybe the day should have been cancelled. Taking the car to the shop, out to breakfast, off to dance class, a trip to the store. Home for Zach's nap, then lunch. Jeff and Teagan went to see a local community theatre production of "Beauty and the Beast." Zach and I made dinner (lasagna rolls that were delish). The family ate, Christy came over, we all went out for ice cream. In the course of that busy day, Teagan had time outs, was yelled at, had firm talking to's... the night ended with her trying to run away from me- something she's never done before. This morning started out the same. She woke up a bear. From the moment she woke (around 5 a.m.), she was demanding, questioning everything, creating drama and problems. Then came the breaking point. She stuck her tongue out at me. When she did it yesterday, I made it clear that if she chooses to stick out her tongue, she is choosing to immediately have time away in her room. She stuck it out one time before dinner and was taken immediately to her room. This morning, after nothing but fights and questions and questions and questions... she stuck it out at me. Directly to her room. Crying, screaming, wailing- of the over-dramatic, not sincere variety. We ignored her. I went in to talk to her. I spoke calmly. I made it clear that I preferred to spend time with the Teagan who made good choices and was loving and fun. That we would all have a better time if she was making good choices. And that if she couldn't start making good choices, we wouldn't be able to go to church. I left her in her room. Mind you- the entire time I was talking, very calmly, Teagan was crying on the floor, weeping that she didn't want me to be mad at her, demanding that she didn't want me. But something sank in. She came out of her room about 10 minutes later and she was her "old self." She was smiling and happy and helpful. And has been ever since. She's needed some redirection, of course. But within normal bounds. So I have no clue what was going on for the past 48 or so hours. I am beyond relieved and happy that the change has happened. I wish I knew what the answers were... but we fought through the storm and have hopefully found a spot of calm in the sea.