Saturday, January 24, 2009

The Interview

This all started with this Interview meme reaching a blog I found through Blog of Note. Tangobaby. She’s wicked cool. She lives in my favorite city- San Francisco. She takes amazing photos, has a keen eye for art, an amazing wit, fantastic insight. So when she offered to do Interviews, I couldn’t resist!! She took the time to really delve into the blogs of every single person who wanted to be interviewed. So she’s been doing them in little groupings and giving props each time a blogger posts their interview. She’s really, really wicked cool. So let’s get started! I’ll answer Tangobaby’s “official” questions first. And then I will answer the questions that you, gentle readers, have left for me when I made up my own version of the game!! 1. I see that you have three blogs now (that's prodigious!). For someone who's now just being introduced to you, which blog would you recommend that they start reading first? My main blog is this one, Eternal Lizdom. In addition, back in November, I started a special project at Gratitude and Good Deeds. It ended up becoming a Christmas gift for my mom since she’s the one who taught me compassion and charitable giving. The idea was hatched on a day that I picked up part of the tab for a table of soldiers in a restaurant. From there, I challenged myself to doing a purposeful good deed or kind act every day through the rest of 2008. Sometimes it involved money, sometimes it didn’t. But it was about going beyond any normal niceties and pushing it to the next level. And my third blog just got started this past week and I don’t really know what I’m doing with it. I called it Therapy Thursday and the idea is to post a subject of discussion each week. Folks who participate can be light hearted or serious. 2. I know you are a busy mom taking care of the kiddies, not including your job outside the home. When are you able to carve out time to write your blog? As a mother, how much about your family and your children do you decide to share with your readers? Is privacy an issue for you when you are writing about family matters? Time… sometimes I blog from work. Posts that will take more time to put together (like this one) I work on in the evenings after bedtime and my workout or on the weekends during naptime. Sharing… I’m pretty open. Prior to becoming a blogger, I was very involved in message boards so I feel a certain familiarity with the internet already. Plus, I’d been involved in community theatre and my full name and picture has been published in the newspaper. I guess I just figure that if someone really wanted to stalk me or track me down, there are plenty of other ways. So I use my name, my husband’s name, my kids’ names. Taboo… I have no intentions to use my blog as a place to vent about my husband or complain about my in-laws. Because my husband reads this blog. But really because if I have an issue with my husband and I don’t take it to him but instead share it publicly about him, that just makes it worse and does nothing to fix the issue. As for the in-laws, I don’t really have anything to complain about and if I did, I would expect to talk to Jeff about it and have him handle it since they are his parents. Kinda like the whole “I can talk about my mom but you can’t talk about my mom” thing. 3. What do you think is the greatest challenge facing parents today? If you had been inaugurated on January 20, what would you do to first to help families raise their children? As someone who was very moved and touched by the inauguration last week, what will you say to your children about it when they ask you later in life? I’ve been really mulling over the first part of that question. And I’ve decided that I just can’t answer it! I don’t think there is a universal greatest challenge that can apply to everyone. Each family faces their own challenges and each personality within the family unit handles things uniquely. I do think that parenting is the absolute hardest job out there. There are 2 things that I felt least prepared for. The first was discovering that things that were previously strengths were gone now. For example, I used to work with kids with a wide range of emotional disabilities and issues. I was frequently complimented on my patience. Patience of Job, patience of a saint. Apparently, it only applies to other people's kids. Because I find my patience worn very thin sometimes... maybe because the parenting thing is a 24 hour a day, no days off job. Sometimes, I'm really ashamed of my lack of patience in the hard moments with my kids. The other thing that surprised me was the weight of Fear. I'm a survivor of sexual abuse so I was in tune with some of the things I would need to protect my children from. But once my daughter was born, the immense weight of the Fear of all the possibilities settled in and part of my job is to carry it. It goes so far beyond protecting them from predators or illness. This Fear goes into depths and pieces of my soul that I hadn't ever been aware of before. I also think that we are in the midst of a cultural shift in regards to working families. It seems that the norm is shifting to a 2 parent working family. Saying that, it was one of the reasons I supported President Obama. He is tuned in to that and made campaign promises, laid out a plan that encourages companies to be more family friendly, promotes better and more available quality childcare. So I don’t need to be inaugurated because my candidate, who stands up for the things I believe I need for my family and that is in touch with how families really work, is already in the office!! The Inauguration. It was more, it was beyond, it was everything. What will I tell my children? That I remember when my interest and passion for politics and the political process was reignited. That I remember the moment that my desire to stay involved and aware was awakened. That this Inauguration wasn’t just about our first black President or our first deeply multi-cultural First Family. That this Inauguration is the One that changed everything. That opened the political process again, that truly made government transparent, that focused on technology, that saw a President who lived up to his potential and promises. That this Inauguration was a pivotal moment in our history as a great nation. 4. You seem to have a very good sense of humor. What makes you laugh? This is one of the best compliments I can receive!! My kids make me laugh, my husband makes me laugh, stress makes me laugh, jokes make me laugh, my dog makes me laugh… I’m really pretty easily entertained, I suppose. I love witty humor, dry humor, sarcastic humor, silly humor, even potty humor. Joy make me laugh. Heck, I make myself laugh. I’m pretty damn funny out here in the not-typed world. 5. If you had the ability to speak another language fluently right now, which one would it be and why? American Sign Language. It’s one of the regrets I have from college and high school. I wish I’d pursued opportunities to learn ASL. It’s a life goal of mine, I suppose, to learn it someday. I can finger spell and I can sign “thank you.” I even tried to do baby sign with each kid but neither one took to it. THANK YOU, TANGOBABY!! Lynn asked: What is your favorite drawer in your house and why, and what is in it? Can we see a picture? A drawer in Zach’s dresser that holds baby blankets. Teagan was swaddled in those fleece blankets. Zach was swaddled in those blankets. I intend to someday make a quilt from them. Flartus asked: Well, actually, I came here to see if I could find out what state you live in! 'Cause you made a comment somewhere about living in Dixie. I currently live in Indiana by way of Ohio by way of Kentucky by way of California! More specifically… Indianapolis, Cincinnati, Lexington, Palo Alto. Ok, here's a more reflective question, related to a recent post of yours. If, for some reason, you weren't able to be a Mommy (not even by adoption; no cheating!), what do you think you might do to try to fill that void? Or would you just become that crazy lady who talks to everybody in the store? :) If I didn’t have my babies and I couldn’t adopt or foster, I’d have a house full of animals. Prior to becoming a mommy, my dogs were my babies. Everything revolved around them and their needs and wants. Trips to the dog park, the store. Canned food and frequent treats and a bin full of toys and sweaters and snow booties… I really think I was prepping for parenthood on some level! Oh- and I'm already that crazy lady who talks to everybody in the store. Seriously. And an easy question: what made you decide to sit down one day and start a blog? Peer pressure. Seriously. Christy and Latifa made me. Anytime I’d tell a story or share thoughts, one of them would pipe up and tell me that I really needed to start a blog and share myself with the world! I didn’t believe them for the longest time… but am so glad I finally did! Alix asked: Which celebrity do you (or do you wish you) had sexy dreams about? And why. Gotta say that I don’t have sexy dreams about famous people. All of my sexy dreams since 2001 have been about my husband. I’ve never been one to really have crushes on Hollywood types. Not a very exciting answer, I know. Lynn F asked: If you could change one event in your past, what would that be....and how would you change it?

I really try to live my life without regrets. And I also believe that everything that happened in my past has brought me to where I am. I believe that I am more open to other people because I've been in places that others haven't. I share my story pretty openly- sexually abused, poor, divorced parents, absent father, step father, major moves, and so on. I wouldn't change any of those things.

But there is one incident I have deep regret for from high school. I said something truly horrible to a girl in my class. Something ignorant and stupid and hateful. I'm really still very ashamed of it. So much so, that I won't go into details on it. To be honest, I don't think it was a huge deal to her. But I look back on it and cannot believe the words that came out of my mouth. One sentence. If I were to even tell you what I said, it would be so completely out of character... you might not even believe me.

Joanie asked: You've mentioned a theater background before and I'm curious.... Did you want to pursue acting seriously, and why did you give it up?

I’ve never had any desire, at least not since 3rd grade, to grow up to become a famous movie star. My interest in theatre came solely from my passion for it as an art form. I don’t believe that I have any sort of great talent. I just have a love for it! I gave it up for mommyhood. The greatest production I’ve ever been involved in! Theatre takes up a lot of time. The community theatre circles around here typically put up a show after 6 weeks of rehearsals and then runs for 3 weekends. Given that I work full time during the work week, I really can’t imagine choosing to give up any additional time with my kids by being out of the house each evening and time on the weekends, too. Someday they will be busy with their own activities and friends… and that’s when I can look into getting back to it! Garret asked: If you had a song autoplay on your blog, what would it be? This would change all the time… right now, it would be… “I’m Yours” by Jason Mraz. Other days… something from Chorus Line or maybe some Beyonce or maybe Natasha Bedingfield. Lori asked: Liz, I have to ask - where in upper MN did you sled??? I ask because my cousin is an Ititarod and Beargrease racer and ironically, I have met several people recently that tried their hand at racing with him!!!! I had the most fantastic opportunity my freshman year of high school… I went on a school sponsored trip with a small group of students and a couple of teachers to Ely, Minnesota. I forget the name of the group we mushed with… but it was a week long trip- the drive up there in the school van, a day or two of training, and then out in the wilderness with dog sleds, teams of dogs, and each other. So many stories from that trip!! And my darling Jeff… How / why do you put up with me? Insanity. Or love. Same difference. You are my best friend. I tell you everything and can tell you anything. You offer me everything I’ve so desperately sought throughout my life- love, acceptance, security, loyalty. You are the one person that I fully and completely trust. You make me laugh- most of the time. I love the feel of your hand on mine. I love the feel of your arms around me, as I lose myself in your embrace. I love watching you with your children, seeing you laugh with them, play with them. I love that we are on this parenting journey together. You support me in every aspect of life. I can see us being together from now until forever and ever. You define my eternity. And the sex is awesome. Really awesome. Really. *** So now you know! Maybe you want to know more? Maybe you know too much? Here’s the deal… if you want me to interview you, leave a comment and say “Interview me!” And feel free to borrow my twist on the game and invite your readers to go beyond my 5 questions and ask what they want to know. And from here forward, anything you want to know, just ask!


mimbles said...

Wow, great questions and fascinating responses, you make a great interview subject Liz :)

OK, I'll bite - interview me!

Boozy Tooth said...

Considering I had a sexy dream about (of all people) David Caruso, I'm thinking you don't have to make any apologies.

Love your interview. Great Q&As!

Sonja said...

Great post! I think I have to borrow that idea some time.
Interview me!!!

Garret said...

Awesome post. So well thought out.

Alison said...

Your hubbie's a lucky guy. Your paragraph reminds me of the best gift I ever I got from my Miss Chef. It was just a framed list of things she loves about me. She was nervous that I would think she was being cheap, but it made me cry! How wise of you to be so open about your love.

Eternal Lizdom said...

I love your gift from Miss Chef!!

When Teagan was born, a few weeks into it, I wrote Jeff a love letter. Each sentence started with "I'm proud of you ... " I'm pretty sure he still has it. I assume it meant a lot to him- it meant a lot to me to write it!

tangobaby said...

Liz! I loved your answers to the questions... and I'm so flattered that you think I'm wicked cool. Usually I just feel wicked.

Thank you for taking the time to give such thoughtful and in-depth answers. I really enjoyed this post so very much, which reminds me: I have to tell the world about you, too!


Kristi said...

Just saw this Liz! Feel free to "interview me" if you need more subjects!